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Topic: ATTN Starship Captains: What ship would you captain as part of its race? (Read 6268 times)
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Valaggar
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(Topic idea shamelessly ripped from Lukipela's "Serving your race, where to do so" thread on SCDB)
So, let's say that you were killed on a Fury and given the choice to reincarnate as a captain of any race in SC2/SC1. What vessel would you captain? (As a member of its race, of course, i.e. if you choose Orz, it means that you are Orz guiding the ship with its *fingers*; if you choose Skiff, it means that you are an Arilou captain piloting that UFO.)
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« Last Edit: June 14, 2007, 10:33:14 am by Valaggar »
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Shiver
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Argh, it's a GIANT WALL OF TEXT. The topic concept is pretty good in spite of that so I'll go along with it.
Commanding a Syreen Penetrator would be so fantastic I don't see why anyone would want to choose anything else. Eleven female Syreen subordinates who have had virtually no contact with the male gender? Yes please. Also, I get to turn hostile aliens into zombified slaves and make them do all the frustrating chores.
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Shiver
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Anyway, here's another thing to think about with the Syreen ship: You'd have to wear the official uniform of a Syreen captain...  You silly males...
I really doubt they would make their men wear the exact same thing. Plus, I'm still a human captain so why not just wear a human officer's uniform?
I think all you hormone ridden boys may be overestimating your prowess. I doubt it'd be great fun to serve on a Syreen cruiser. Assuming that that hypnosis of theirs doesn't just rob you of the ability to think, how enjoyable would it be to serve long shifts while strongly aroused? I mean, 8 to 10 hours of serious blue balls, and then no rest, and then another shift of the same, until finally one resting period, your lack of sleep overwhelms your nether instincts. Rinse and repeat.
Now that is a silly argument. Constant exposure to them would desensitize a person enough that they could concentrate like normal. And it's not a matter of "prowess", the Syreen have a major scarcity of males so one doesn't need to be the pinnacle of masculinity to appeal to them.
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Valaggar
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The topic concept is pretty good in spite of that so I'll go along with it.
Of course it is. It's derived from the brain of the most handsome and dazzling individual on these or any other boards. 
I'd pilot a good ol' Earthling Cruiser. Why, you ask? Well, starships need pilots of the same race as they were designed for. I'd pilot an Earthling Cruiser because at least I'd be able to fly it.  Anyway, here's another thing to think about with the Syreen ship: You'd have to wear the official uniform of a Syreen captain... You silly males...
Argh, it's a GIANT WALL OF TEXT. The topic concept is pretty good in spite of that so I'll go along with it.
Commanding a Syreen Penetrator would be so fantastic I don't see why anyone would want to choose anything else. Eleven female Syreen subordinates who have had virtually no contact with the male gender? Yes please. Also, I get to turn hostile aliens into zombified slaves and make them do all the frustrating chores.
Hey! You are the same race as the ship you command! Unless Syreen are lesbian, I don't see why you'd get that much sexual satisfaction aboard a Penetrator.
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AngusThermopyle
*Smell* controller
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Gender: 
Posts: 304
A paranoid android.
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Well, if given a chance to serve aboard any given Alliance ship, it might be fun to serve aboard an Avatar. Must be neat aboard a ship with all that super-advanced technology.
The Syreen argument sounded good at first until I remembered the Syreen/Earthling crew exchange incedent mentioned in the SC1 manual:
Earthling Cruiser Zybernaught loaned a Syreen Penetrator six crew members in an exchange approved by the Alliance’s Commander-in-Chief. This experiment used the flexible humanoids as a test for possible multilateral crew exchanges between Alliance races. Zybernaught’s Captain Zeke Ziniovic reported no difficulty recruiting volunteers for the exchange program. ‘They lined up to board the transfer vessel. I had to separate a few of the boys who got caught up in hormonal overload’. The transfer was effected, and after a few days, a strange thing occurred: Volunteers began to send distress calls from the Penetrator hostess ship. Requests to return were issued almost hourly, until the Cruiser’s Space Dinghy was sent to take three volunteers back to the mother ship. When the dinghy docked, the returned lads entered the main crew compartment gingerly. Unshaven, bleary-eyed and staggering, they immediately sought out the Cruiser’s dispensary. Captain Ziniovic immediately radioed the Penetrator hostess ship, demanding the return of the remaining volunteers. The Penetrator’s response: ‘Volunteers happy here, talk to you tomorrow’.
If I were to pilot a ship, I'd go with the Spathi.
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« Last Edit: June 12, 2007, 03:44:05 pm by AngusThermopyle »
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Bluhman
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Thraddash Torch. It seems to be comfortable inside, and the ability to zoom around at ludicrous speeds while leaving behind fire seems cool. Though, I'll have to tolerate cigar smoke a lot.
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Valaggar
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Thraddash Torch. It seems to be comfortable inside, and the ability to zoom around at ludicrous speeds while leaving behind fire seems cool. Though, I'll have to tolerate cigar smoke a lot.
Hello! You're a Thraddash! You tolerate that cigar.
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Lukipela
Enlightened
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The Ancient One
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Now that is a silly argument. Constant exposure to them would desensitize a person enough that they could concentrate like normal. And it's not a matter of "prowess", the Syreen have a major scarcity of males so one doesn't need to be the pinnacle of masculinity to appeal to them.
Assuming that you are a human captain (apparently we're supposed to be aliens as well, unlike the original topic), I really doubt that. Sure, if they were just ordinary good looking women, most of us wouldn't have any problems. But these aren't just good looking blue skinned babes we're talking about here. They enchant and fascinate, hypnotize and dazzle. Like Angus quoted:
Earthling Cruiser Zybernaught loaned a Syreen Penetrator six crew members in an exchange approved by the Alliance’s Commander-in-Chief. This experiment used the flexible humanoids as a test for possible multilateral crew exchanges between Alliance races. Zybernaught’s Captain Zeke Ziniovic reported no difficulty recruiting volunteers for the exchange program. ‘They lined up to board the transfer vessel. I had to separate a few of the boys who got caught up in hormonal overload’. The transfer was effected, and after a few days, a strange thing occurred: Volunteers began to send distress calls from the Penetrator hostess ship. Requests to return were issued almost hourly, until the Cruiser’s Space Dinghy was sent to take three volunteers back to the mother ship. When the dinghy docked, the returned lads entered the main crew compartment gingerly. Unshaven, bleary-eyed and staggering, they immediately sought out the Cruiser’s dispensary. Captain Ziniovic immediately radioed the Penetrator hostess ship, demanding the return of the remaining volunteers. The Penetrator’s response: ‘Volunteers happy here, talk to you tomorrow’.
Those boys didn't do too well at all, and they were just serving in a crew capacity. Being a Captain demands a whole lot more concentration than being an ensign, and I very much doubt anyone would last long before they cracked.
Hello! You're a Thraddash! You tolerate that cigar.
You might want to change the thread topic to "ATTN Captains: What race would you like to be part of and command ships for?". I'm betting that right now, most people are simply reading the topic (which doesn't mention that you are an alien), and then skipping your first post because it is incredibly long. That's why my original post was short and formatted, people don't want to start off by reading enormous amounts.
EDIT: Also in the first post before you begin rattling off every ship known to man, you actually just state that the person can be reincarnated as any captain of any race. So shouldn't people be able to choose Umgah Captain of a Skiff or Ur-Quan captain of a Jugger?
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« Last Edit: June 12, 2007, 07:28:40 pm by Lukipela »
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What's up doc?
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Valaggar
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__________________________________________________________________________________
#Will you side with the renegade clones and blaze your way through the enemy Cruisers, all while shouting and yelling and cursing your Human oppressors?
#Will you command a Skiff and abduct cows and humans, conduct strange experiments, jump across the galaxy through dimensional doorways which are at your beck and call, and cut the enemy Podships in half with your laser?
#Will you minutely plan your every thrust as a slow and prudent Chenjesu captain of an even slower Broodhome?
#Will you tear apart the most powerful Ur-Quan Eterna-tech-reinforced Dreadnought while cowardly hiding behind your ZapSats for protection against small projectiles, as a Chmmr Avatar captain?
#Will you comfortably hang in chains in a Druuge command chamber and order your subordinates to fulfill your every command, including "To the furnace!" and "Take control of the ship, I want to rest a bit"?
#Will you rather be one of the two twins (one male and one female) that traditionally command Earthling Cruisers, launching recycled MX missiles and hoping not to suffer the same fate as the Tobermoon in the Oort Cloud (whatever that was)?
#Will you incinerate Furies and Cruisers in the name of Dogar, The Dark Beast With a Thousand Young and Kazon, The Hungry Lurker in the Night, ready to rip your highly regenerative limbs if you fail even by one pixel to follow the path set for you by your Dark Gods, as the captain of an Ilwrath Avenger?
#Would you rather avoid combat and trek between the stars making deals with juicy information and not forgetting to denigrate the Druuge's name at every step, in the shoes of a Melnorme Trader (and on his comfortable pillow covering the MetaChron) bearing the name of your favourite colour?
#Will you serve your unknown master in the flexible X-Form starships, defeating virtually any ship with enough skill (i.e. Tiberian skill)?
#Would you spread Juffo-Wup, the hot light in the darkness, and Void the Non for the time when your Creators will return, in the resilient Podship vessel? (And be part of a Birthing Fleet while implanting a Deep Child beneath the crust of a new world, a cold rock, spinning silently in the Void)
#Would you rather not take risks and just put your *fingers* in peril by *dancing* around *heavy space* *gravity centers*, launching *GO! GO!*s and *dissolving* the *silly cows* (in an Orz Nemesis of course)?
#Will you command a ship whose maneuverability has no equal, whose speed is bested only by the spirits in the highest astral planes, and whose survivability is infinite should you care to reincarnate, as the captain of a Pkunk Fury?
#Will you sacrifice for honour, glory and your race as the fearless marsupial captain of a Shofixti Scout vessel (Note: No Tanaka/Katana - in case you like to procreate wildly - and not the Scout sent to the Yehat as proof of the rebirth of the Shofixti species)
#Would you rather not captain a ship, but BE a ship as a Catalog Item 2418-B... Remote Self-Replicating Robot Explorer Probe, seeking sentients and anomalies and, best of all, breaking targets into component compounds?
#Do you prefer the safe haven that is the fast and smart Spathi Discriminator, not risking your life pointlessly for stupid things such as honour and glory or the future of your race and praying each morning "Oh God... please don't let me die today! Tomorrow would be SO much better!"?
#Do you want to embark on a crusade against vegetarians on a Supox Blade, visiting curiosities such as the firefalls of Nalnar (Theta Hyades I) and the servants of Mali (Gamma Leporis VII) and thrusting virtually towards any direction while launching super-powered carnivorous green globs which spell doom for the best armoured ships?
#Are you a perverse zoo/xenophile who likes to "motivate" hypnotized spiders and caterpillars by your own... umm... "special ways" aboard the pleasurably-ribbed Syreen Penetrator?
#Do you prefer hurling MASSIVE bolts of super-sharp coloured rocks at enemy ships, using your Reeunk Afterburners against retarded enemies and teaching lessons to any trespassers in the indestructible "Trads Torc", as they spell it?
#Or are you rather the type of being who likes to invite Mycons on your ships for dinner and then clonk them in the head, annihilate their vessel with antimatter and escape with your high-speed retropropulsion system to the safety of Beta Orionis I... or is it safe anymore? (STOP. THE. HUMAN. DESTROY. VESSEL.)
#Will you cleanse the galaxy of filth in the bulky, yet gruesomely powerful, Kohr-Ah Marauder, clinging above a Bone Pit containing a skeleton from each race you have personally exterminated?
#Would you rather just enslave any non-Ur-Quan sentient life with your indestructible Dreadnought, which is in fact fourty-two vessels in one?
#Would you follow your fate as the Ultron-appointed captain of a Jugger, using your powerful salvo of lightsabers to blast Marauders into oblivion and your impenetrable shield to protect yourself from the most powerful weapons in the world (don't forget to don your mask of Valor and Derring-Do)?
#Would you turn off your viewscreen (rather than bear the look of those disgusting Humans longer) and press the Big Red Button with no remorse to obliterate the grotesque monster that is your enemy (plus, luckily, you spawn right next to the enemy ship, so you don't have to endure their limitless ugliness too long), in a VUX Intruder, the last word in lifeform destruction?
#Or would you hack and slash your way through the enemy lines with your steady and stylish Yehat Terminator?
#Or would you be clever and pick the best of the ships, the Zoq-Fot Stinger! Frungy field and a big Frungyvision included.
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(For one, I would pick the Orz Nemesis: I hate risking my life, I prefer playing to fighting.)
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Pages: [1] 2 3
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, so it's a bonus if I get killed.